Remembering My Annie

school friend

I knew Ann Schaffer but I did not know Ann Elder. From reading the stories here I wish I had. But nothing surprises me as the Annie I knew in school was on her way to great things. I may grieve the loss of a different Ann than many of you but I can relate to so many experiences while you knew her.

I shared a homeroom, a locker…marched in the TJ high school band with Ann…spent 3 weeks traveling to Wyoming and back in a yellow school bus with our girl scout troop and I was her friend. When a mutual high school friend told me the news of Anne’s sudden passing I was shocked. Not our Annie…she was too full of life. They say “the good die young” sadly this proves to be true. I can honestly say in all the time I knew her through Jr. and Sr. high I can’t remember a single unkind word she ever uttered about anyone. She always had an encouraging word, smile or a laugh. I think the two places Ann was most “at home” was playing her trumpet or setting up a campsite…both she did with vigor and precision. During a time in most young people’s lives…that awkward stage of self doubt and insecurities…Ann seemed to be centered and so comfortable in her skin. With Ann what you saw is what you got with no pretense. I admit as an unsure teen I envied her and admired her. But mostly I enjoyed her humor and friendship. 

Ann was a leader but didn’t ask for followers. Ann lived by example but never expected anyone to watch her. She was content in doing her part…holding up her end…and never complained. Whether she was in front of our band conducting or putting up a tent on one of our scout trips…you knew you could depend on Ann. I often did. She listened to my teenage gripes about anything…the boy trumpet player I had a crush on or my lack of skills starting a campfire. And she kept a secret and didn’t judge. 

After I heard the sad news I went and found my TJ yearbooks. There was the Ann, my friend I knew…her dimpled smiling face next to me in the photos. And I searched for her messages to me and memories came flooding back…she wrote about getting to know me better…how my poetry was deep…mentioned that trumpet player…our messy locker and of course our Wyoming trip…how she was glad I was there…so am I. 

Tom, I did not know your Annie, your wife. But I did know Annie Schaffer, my school friend who I will fondly remember and the young girl in me will grieve her sweet soul leaving this earth. I know she is someplace safe and has already stepped up to help. As girl scouts our motto was to always leave a campsite better than we found it…Annie with everyplace she went…left it better. 

“Music makes pictures and often tells stories. All of it magic and all of it true.” ~ John Denver